What a difference a year makes!

Sorry I haven't written in so long. I can't believe the last time I wrote was August. It seems like such a long time ago, yet really nothing significant has happened since then.

I had a girl's weekend in San Antonio in October.
We dressed up as garden gnomes for Halloween.
Emi took her first trip to Vegas in November. She didn't do too well at the slots, but Scott did!
We had a great Thanksgiving and Xmas, with a lot of face time with Scott's family.
We had a very uneventful New Years, with me falling asleep on the couch at about 9:30pm. Scott woke me up at midnight, and then I promptly fell back asleep.

What I couldn't help thinking tonight is what a difference a year makes in the life of a baby. Last year, Emi was too young to really appreciate Xmas. This year she was still a tad too young (I think next year is going to be a fun one), but she was at least able to play with toys and really enjoyed the cookies that Papa made. Last year she was eating baby food, and this year she is almost eating everything we eat (although she is a picky eater). Last year, getting her to sleep was pretty painful with lots of rocking and singing and crying, but now it only takes a few minutes to get her to sleep. She might cry a little bit on a rare occasion, but after 5 minutes she's usually fast asleep. And the biggest difference is that she's walking, and running, and trying to communicate (in the form of whining mainly).

The one thing that strikes me is how little she's gotten sick this year (knock on wood, since it's still the middle of winter). Last year, it seemed like we were at the doctor and on antibiotics almost every other week. This year, she got a runny nose and seemed pretty congested prior to Xmas, but other than that she's seemed really healthy. Even with molars coming in this fall, she did great.

Parenting has not gotten easier, but I think Scott and I are more comfortable with it. Everyday is something new, and right now the excitement of all the positive changes (I can't wait until she talks clearly!) outshine the negative (like when applesauce ends up all over the dogs after a bowl chuck).

So we had a pretty good 2010, and I look forward to a fun and exciting 2011. Happy New Year!

Emi's new haircut

Previous haircut:
















Meet Emi Ray Cyrus (mom and dad's attempt of a haircut):



Today:














Background: About a month and half ago (I think), Emi started pulling her hair out. It started out with just a few strands here and there, and then we noticed the receding hairline across her forehead. Then it turned into a completely bald spot spanning almost 1/4 of her head (the left front quadrant). We asked the doctor about it, and she said it was probably a bad habit that she has developed along with sucking on her finger. As she pulled the hair our, she kept going back further to find more long hair to pull. After a bunch of lab work to make sure she didn't have a mineral deficiency or anything else, the recommendation was to shave her head to break the bad habit. I didn't want to completely shave the kid bald, so we tried a half way solution. Not good, and we chose not to go with the hari krishna look either. So meet the new Emi, bald for the first (and hopefully last) time in her life. I think in about 3 months she'll have the head of hair she was born with...

Goodnight

I'm not sure why I am feeling so sentimental tonight. It might be because it's so quiet in the house tonight, or that things have settled down a little earlier in the evening than normal, or because I just finished watching a relatively intense episode of "The Closer". But I can't help but think that life is short, and that it if you are not careful it can pass you by faster than you could ever anticipate.

As I turned the TV off, prepared bottles for daycare tomorrow, turned off the lights and headed upstairs, I had to fight the urge to pick Emi up and just cuddle with her for the rest of the night. If I am lucky, I will have a very long time to hug her, to show her I love her, to get to know her and hopefully become friends with her. I think about my parents and how lucky I am to have them as such a big part of my life. They are some of my favorite people in this world, and I am fortunate that our relationship has blossomed into what it is today. I hope that I am as lucky as they are. I hope I get at least 35 years to know my daughter, to see what she becomes, and stand by her every milestone in life.

35 years sounds like a very long time, and hopefully it will turn out to be much longer than that. But right now, I just feel like Emi's first year has flown by. If the remainder of the years pass at this pace, it might make 35 years feel more like 35 seconds. I can only hope that one day I will be old and gray, and Scott is by my side and we can look at the daughter that we created and know that the world is right. But right now, I just feel like I want to hug Emi and not let this moment, this age, this day, this overwhelming love I feel for her go.

July, already?!

I sometimes see Scott going to this blog to see if I have updated it lately, and he sees that nothing has changed and goes onto the next surfing site on his list. Of course the guilt has set in, and I am now updating things so that he has something to read next time he checks. I am still convinced that he is the only person that reads this...

Emi has started walking up a storm. We definitely see her walk now; every day, all around the house, up the entire flight of stairs (ok, that's more crawling), and right out the back door. She seems to prefer being on her feet now, and her balance is getting better every day. She can walk the entire circle of our living room and kitchen without falling, and we can sit on the couch and listen to the sounds of her heavy footsteps on the floor as she disappears from sight on one side and comes back on the other side of the kitchen. It's the cutest thing.

We had a nice 4 day 4th of July holiday. I packed it full of activities, and maybe it was just too much because I got sick on the last day of our holiday. We went to see The Last Airbender, took Emi to her first Padres game, saw Avenue Q, and met with friends. Emi did great at the Padres game, and I think she really enjoyed it. She ate almost an entire pretzel, and bounced every time the music played. She even took a nap through the 8th and 9th innings.

I have been sick since that weekend and spent almost this entire past weekend in bed. Scott was a lifesaver and took care of Emi and let me get the rest that I needed. It seems like we didn't have quality time with each other this past weekend, which really sucks and it's going to make this week feel very long until he's home again on Friday.

All in all, things are great, and I can't believe that the summer is already half over. Where is the time going? Next things we know, Emi will be 1 year old (I am a little sad about that) and it will be fall.

Mom and Dad are the last to see things happen

On Friday, I picked Emi up from daycare, and they asked me what I had been practicing at home. I'm sure I had a confused look on my face, and they explained that they thought I had been practicing walking with her because today she took 3 steps, and yesterday she walked a little, too.

So that's the trouble with daycare. Your kids will most likely take their "firsts" when you are not around to see it happen.

All weekend we watched and waited, and urged Emi to walk. No luck. She stood up on her own (a first for us, too), but no walking.
UNTIL, Sunday night when grandma/pa were over for dinner. Upstairs, grandma and I were getting Emi's PJs on, and she walked a few steps towards grandma. Then downstairs, she took a few steps in the living room. Yay!

As much as I have been waiting for this moment, it's a little sad now that it's here.
My baby is growing up so fast... I look at some of her newborn pictures and think "who is that baby, you look nothing like her anymore".

Guess how much I spent for this?

Scott says I have a new obsession (this time I agree, unfortunately). But it is saving us a boat load! I paid $3.58 for all of this: 11 boxes of pasta and 4 roma tomatoes.

I always clipped coupons, but I was the person who looked through them every 5-6 trips I made to the store only to find that they were all expired. I have started following various coupon websites and blogs, and have started matching up sales at the store with my coupons. The trick is to try to get multiple coupons (mom saves the adds for me from the paper, I print them off the web, etc).

I must give credit where due:
The Krazy Coupon Lady
Money Saving Mom
The Coupon Queen, who may have a weekly column in your newspaper (she does in mine, and started this craziness for me!)


Above, Ronzoni Smart Taste pasta sells for $2.49 a box. They had them on sale for $1, and I had 11 $.75 off coupons. Each box only cost me 25 cents! And those who know me well know I love pasta, so this will eventually all get eaten.

Now, I need to hunt around for some sauce on sale and I'll be all set!

Socks!

The other day, Scott said that I had a sock addiction. I think it's completely normal, you have to buy what your child needs, right?

Last week I noticed that she outgrew all her plain white socks. All the socks that she had were colored or striped, and didn't go with some of her outfits. So we went and got the 6 pack of plain white socks at Target.

Here's a pic of my sock score this past weekend. Since she's starting to stand up on everything, and Bema thinks she's going to walk soon, I figured I should stock up on socks that have the little rubber grippies on the bottom so she has some traction. It's a tile floor at daycare, and regular socks can get awfully slippery! They had a sale going on, so I figured I would also buy the next size up, to take advantage of the sale. I also found the cutest knee high socks to make more legwarmers for her. It's getting to be summer (and her old legwarmers are getting a little small), so she'll be in onesies and creepers more, and needs the legwarmers to cover her knees for all the crawling that she does.

Completely normal, right?
BTW - I am still so irritated that all girl baby clothes (and socks) are always pink! What if we don't like pink? How about some cool colors like magenta, or black, or leopard print?

Our new normal - for now

It's been a while since I've updated this, so I wanted to get something out here since we've had a lot going on lately.

Scott:
On March 18th, Scott graduated! Emi and I went to DC, and both sides of our families were there to help him celebrate. We all flew home from DC together, and after a few days off, Scott reported to his first day of work in LA. It sounds like he's starting to get settled in, doing a lot of admin "new guy on the block" kind of work, but hopefully he'll be getting some exciting assignments soon. Until we decide what to do with our living situation, Scott is staying at Eric's place Sun - Thu night (thank you Eric!), and coming home on the weekends. His commute from the office to our house is about 2.5 hours, and his commute from Eric's house to the office is about a half hour on good days.
On April 10th, Scott had a birthday (the first birthday as a father). I didn't get him a card (oops), but we were together and had a great weekend. Happy Birthday, honey.

Emi:
Right before we went to DC for Scott's graduation, Emi started crawling. She is now all over the place, and the little bugger is fast. She seems to love the dog's bowls, and has more than once put her hands in their water bowls and made a mini-mess. We got her a jumperoo, and that thing is her favorite toy. I try not to put her in it too much (don't want the novelty to wear out too soon), but when she does go in, she can jump and play for about an hour. That's plenty of time to get things around the house done without having to chase Emi. A few weeks ago, Emi started pulling herself up. She can stand herself up in her crib, on the coffee table, on Bear, on us, pretty much anything. And I guess we are lucky that she also knows how to plop herself down again. I've heard stories of kids standing up in their cribs in the middle of night, and cry because they don't know how to let go.

Colette:
I've become a pro at flying with Emi (ok, maybe it's her that's become the pro). I've also gotten in a pretty good routing with work, daycare, and taking care of Emi. Things at work are pretty busy, and I'm also trying to squeeze in a bit of quality personal time during the week with Emi, with friends, and getting out of the house for errands and shopping. This past weekend we splurged and decided to get the BOB stroller, and it's great. Hopefully now I can work some exercise time into mix. At least now there is greater incentive to walk to daycare! Last week, we had an earthquake which we all felt. We were in the kitchen, and Emi was in her jumperoo. That was the most exciting thing to happen in a few weeks!

Our new normal feels pretty good for now (after Scott being gone for 5 months, this is a big improvement). I know he's sad to leave every Sunday night (it must be so much harder for him than for us, since we get to stay in our house each week), but things will work themselves out and we'll end up where we are supposed to be in a few months. Overall, the Z's are hanging in there!

Commando Crawling

Emi can now sit up on her own, and she is getting very close to crawling. It's getting to the point where you can't really take your eyes off her anymore (and unfortunately, I have to vacuum a lot more!) She gets up on her hands and knees and rocks as if she's about to take her first crawl any day now. When she wants to get from point A to point B she will do her "Commando Crawl".

6 months - how time flies

I can't believe my little girl is 6 months old. At our last check up, she didn't gain any weight or grow at all, so the doctor said it's time to really pick up the amount of solids that she's eating. She is getting cereal twice a day (once at daycare, and they said she's doing great with it) and veggies at dinner. I'm going to start giving her fruits in the morning, too - so she'll be eating 2 full meals a day along with all the milk that she normally gets.

So far, she has had (and loved): rice cereal, oatmeal cereal, squash, sweet potatoes, pears, carrots, and apples. I am trying my hand at making baby food, and I have made her the carrots and apples. Hopefully I'll be able to make most, if not all, of her food. The challenge is finding containers to store them all in. I bought little baby food containers, but the batch of carrots made so much that only half of what I made fit in all the containers. I am keeping the Gerber containers that she finishes, and I still had no place to put the rest of the carrots. Mental note: don't make so much at once, and don't throw out the ice cube trays that come with the fridge next time (no matter how much I think that I will never use them since we have an ice maker).

She also was diagnosed with an ear infection at her last doctor's appt. So she started another round of antibiotics, and she seems to be feeling much better. She still tugs a little at her ear (she finished the medicine about a week ago), and I'll have them check her ear again at her next appt in 1.5 weeks.

Emi and I went to DC to visit Scott for President's Day weekend. I came down with some sort of stomach thing the day before our trip (I blame the Chick Fil A that I had that night), but was feeling well enough to travel. I didn't take a stroller, and checked the car seat in, so it was a very easy flight with nothing more than the baby in the Ergo carrier and the diaper bag to carry. She did great on the flights, and even ate dinner on the plane (sweet potatoes) on the way home. It was a short but great trip, and of course it was wonderful spending time with Scott. We got to visit with family and friends, too.

Six months has really flown by with Emi, and I still can't believe that I am a mother and I seriously still feel like I am learning about Emi and how to take care of her every day. I guess that feeling will never go away, huh? As soon as I get use to something and we get into a good routine, she starts to do something new and we have to adjust again. Oh well, I take it one day at a time, and I love every minute of it (most of the time :-P )

Firsts (cont.)

At Emi's 5 month check up, she weighed in at 14 lbs, and 26 1/4 inches. The doctor said she is definitely teething, and that she's ready to be started on rice cereal. Wow, my baby is growing up!

Firsts

Emi went through many firsts, in the span of just 2 weeks.

First cold
First sinus infection
First antibiotics
First plane ride
First trip to DC
First Christmas
First New Years

Minus the sickness, we had a very nice xmas. The trip to DC was actually easier than I thought it would be. Flying with Emi wasn't bad (she was only a little fussy on the last 2 hours of the flight home). The biggest hassle was all the stuff that we traveled with. Next time, I plan to check the car seat in as luggage, and not bring the stroller. I'll just bring the Moby wrap, or borrow or buy an Ergo Baby, which I hear is the best baby carrier around.

Scott's parents drove to DC to spend New Years with us. Scott spend all xmas day and half the following day in bed - but that's the price he paid for having his sick family in town for the holidays. Even through the sickness, I'm sure he thinks it was a small price to pay for having us with him (at least I hope that's what he thinks!). Seeing him over the holidays made me miss him even more once we got home.
I've already booked my flight to be in DC for President's Day weekend.

Hopefully 2010 is a great year, and I have a feeling it's going to fly by.

Those darn kids!!!!

I hate the kids in my neighborhood, and I completely blame them for the fender bender that I got into yesterday. There are a lot of elementary-plus age kids in our neighborhood, and they like to run around in the middle of streets, taunt cars, leave bikes lying in the middle of the street, and go zooming into the street without looking for cars. I secretly hope that someone runs over one of their bikes one day, just to teach them a lesson. And the worst part, is that the parents are no where in sight. If one of them ever got hit by a car, I bet the parents would never know unless someone knocked on their door to tell them. Irresponsible!

Yesterday, I was on my way to pick Emi up from daycare, and the kids seemed to be hovering around the area by our houses. It's strange, I didn't recognize any of them, and the girl from across the street was not out with them. What are they doing in front of my house! They were zipping back and forth on their bikes and scooters in the middle of the street. I then saw a black SUV come down the street, and turn the corner by the dead end. I put the car in reverse, look both ways, find the stupid kids (who are on the sidewalk directly across the street) and back up slowly. Then BUMP. I hear one of the damn kids squeal. OMG - I hit a kid! I am freaking out! I look behind me, and I backed right into my neighbor across the street, who was also backing out in that black SUV (our butts hit). First - I guess we were both in each other's blind spots. Second - what's he doing in this black SUV?

This is a neighbor that I have never talked to, but he was so nice. We exchanged info (he told me it's his daughter's car that he's watching over the holidays), and we agreed that we hate the kids. We were both watching for the stupid kids, and not looking at the driveways. What a way to meet your neighbor, huh?

So, normally I drive about .5 miles a day (to daycare, and back from daycare). And go figure, I get into an accident. They do say that accidents happen close to home - who knew it would be in my driveway? And why is it that every time Scott leaves home, I get into an accident (this makes 4!). I really am a good driver, I swear! I think this is the world's way of telling us that Scott and I should never be apart, what do you think?

To single moms out there, I salute you...

And I thought being a mom was hard. I have a new respect for single moms.

When Emi was born, I related to and respected all moms out there. Being a mom is tiring, and it is hard work. Stay at home moms definitely have a "job". But I grew to like being a stay at home mom. I remember when Scott went to Iraq, many people said "well, at least you don't have kids so it won't be too bad". I actually think it was harder when he was in Iraq. I was depressed and lonely. But Scott's absense isn't as bad this go round (granted, I am not worried for his safetly and his well being). I have a reason for getting up in the morning, a daily distraction, and I have company (not that Bear wasn't a great best friend for 8 months). But, like I said before, being a mom is hard work. Every day is unpredictable (becuase Emi doesn't have a routine yet). I don't know if she'll sleep through the night, what time she'll get up in the morning, if it will be a good day or a fussy day, if she will take any naps, nor what time she will go to bed. But the giggles, the smiles, and the fun that we have together is worth it.

Now, I have found that being a single mom must be 1000 times harder than just being a mom. I consider myself a 70% single mom right now. I at least have the luxury of being able to talk to Scott daily, to vent to him if I need to, and the comfort of knowing that this is temporary and he will be home in 4 months.

I am not enjoying being back to work. It has been a busier week than normal (covering for people who are out, new high maintenance and demanding clients, year end rush), but regardless, I dream of going back to being a stay at home mom. At least I can dream about this, and if we really wanted to sacrifice a little and make that a reality, it's an option (well, maybe). Single moms have no choice but to work in order to support their family. I imagine life is a constant juggling act, with many sacrifices and compromises. Single moms need strength, endurance, and motivation. I think single moms are amazing.

Emi's first week at daycare was hard, and probably harder on me than on her. The mornings start very early. And now that she is sleeping through the night most of the time, I hate waking her up in the morning (especially on those night that she does not sleep through the night). Every book says that sleep is so important for a baby's development, I feel like I am short changing her on development time. But we will eventually get our mornings into a routine, and things will be better.

Dropping her off wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be (I fully expected to cry). But I was concentrating so much on not getting emotional, that I completely forgot to say goodbye to her (bad mommy, bad mommy). I got back into the car, looked in the rear view mirror and saw her car seat without her in it, and got a little teary. I was so anxious and concerned about how she was doing, that I went to pick her up early. As soon as I walked through the door, I could hear crying and could tell that it was her. When I walked in the room, there she was; wrapped up in a blanket in the arms of Miss Garry in the rocking chair. When I picked her up she calmed down, and the first question Miss Garry asked was "how do you get her to take a nap?" I knew this was going to a problem. I also remember thinking that she smelled different that day - strange, I know, but it kind of got to me. We chatted a little about what she likes, and I took her home. I had to do some more work, and fortunately Emi took a nap when we got home, probably exhausted from her day of crying. The evening consisted of my trying to bond and make up for the lost hours in the day with Emi, washing and preparing bottles, clothes, and mentally getting ready for tomorrow.

The next day, she was not crying when I picked her up, but she looked puffy like she had cried a lot. We got home and she took a nap. Daycare was not getting any easier yet.

Each day for the rest of the week seemed a little better. By the end of the week she was staying a full day (no more lunch time pick ups), and they said that she wasn't crying as much and that she was starting smile and giggle during the day. I think Emi got used to it a lot quicker than I did. I still hate waking her up in the morning, and hate being away from her for such a long time.

Everyone says this will get easier - but for now it's sad, it's tiring, and single moms amaze me.

Back to work, Happy Thanksgiving!

This title says it all. It was a busy week - back to work, Scott's trip home for Thanksgiving, and Theresa's visit.

I started back at work, and I fully realize that you cannot get anything done with a child at home. I managed those three days with the help of the mute button on the phone, rising before the baby wakes up (gotta love those 6am meeting with the hope that the baby will sleep until 7am), and trying to get as much done during nap time as possible. Bouncing a baby on your knee makes for a lot of typos when trying to create documentation and send emails...

Scott came home on Thursday, and it was great seeing him. Emi and I went to the airport to pick him up, and she was completely asleep when we got there. I took her out of the car seat to meet him as he walked over to the parking area, and I handed her over to him as soon as we saw him. Unfortunately, (I blame it on the sleepiness) Emi took one look at Scott and started to cry. It was not the reunion we had planned for - but Scott and Emi were back to their old playful antics after an hour or two. Since it was Thanksgiving afternoon, and just the three of us, we decided to have Thanksgiving at Tip Top Meats. You can't beat the huge meal that we got for $8.99 a person. We need to go back and try some of their other platters, they all sounded so good. We then headed home for some quality family time.

The next day, Theresa and the family came to visit. It was good seeing them. The kids were so big, and it seemed like it was a very long time since I've seen them all. Scott's trip was way too short - he flew back on Saturday afternoon. Theresa stayed one more night, and headed back to Texas on Sunday. Then, another night of dread - getting Emi ready for the first day of daycare.

The night consisted of getting bottles ready, setting aside a package of diapers and wipes to take, laying out her clothes for tomorrow morning (there will be no decision making at 5:45am), and putting a bag of 3 extra outfits to keep at daycare together (went the easy route with sleep and plays). A quiet and sad ending to a busy week.

All things must come to an end...

Tomorrow, I go back to work. I thought I would be one of those moms who couldn't wait to go back to work; eager for adult interaction, eager to start thinking in "work mode" again, and eager for a return to "normalcy". But here it is, 10pm the night before I go back to work, and I am dreading it. So much that I would like this evening to never end - and I actually straightened up the house, put away folded laundry, went through our piles of junk in the kitchen, and I don't really want to go to bed because I know the very next thing awaiting me is an early morning of work.

Granted, being a stay at home mom is hard work (and usually an earlier start to the day than the alarm for work) - and there are definitely frustrations and days you wish you could just walk out of the house for a half hour and collect yourself (or scream swear words at the top of your lungs). I do think these frustrations are more intense than any frustration you encounter at work (with projects, with deadlines, with clients...) but they are yours and yours alone, and when you get through them you have a (hopefully) sleeping baby, or smiling baby, and a heart full of love. Even if I end up with smiling clients, I don't end up with a heart full of love.

And all these feelings don't even take into account that I will be leaving Emi at daycare. We don't start that until after Thanksgiving, and I'm sure I will have a load of different emotions next Sunday. But for now, I really don't want to go back to work. I even thought "What if I quit my job, and live on our savings for a year, and reassess at that point in time". But, I don't think we can afford that, and I'm sure that once I am back into the swing of things at work it won't be so bad. Hopefully it's just a feeling of anticipation and dread, like when I was a kid and summer break was over. Once you walk into school, it's not so bad.

On another ironic note: a lot of the cleaning tonight is because the cleaners are coming tomorrow. How come I always feel like I have to clean the day before the cleaners come? Oh well...

Roll over...

The other day (3 months, and 2 days) Emi rolled over from her tummy to her back. It was at yoga class, and I didn't really see it, but the teacher did and she said that Emi had a surprised look on her face. That afternoon, she rolled over the same way 3 more times at my parent's house. It was funny, she was just using the weight of her big head to roll her over that shoulder. But since then, she has not done it at all. BUT - she has rolled over from her back to her tummy on 2 different days. Here's a clip of it. So I think this one is here to stay (although she only goes to her left side). Our days of leaving her on the couch while we do something really quick are over. Oh well...

Satisfying

There is something very satisfying about second helpings. I wonder if other people think this, and do something similar. Tonight, I am making spaghetti for dinner - for one. I make just enough that I know I am going to finish it tonight, and have no left overs. But when I dish it out for myself, I only dish out half, so that I can come back and get a second helping. Even though I know I am going to eat all of it. I could dish it all out, and eat it all - but that is just not satisfying. Am I strange?

On another note - I have made it through the first week of Scott being in VA. Overall, not a bad week (sad, but not at tough as I thought it was going to be). Scott left very early on Saturday morning, and I was really feeling bad with a cold that we both caught just in time for his last 2 days at home. Emi was amazing and let me sleep a lot that day, and she was up and happily hanging out in her swing, took nice long naps, and really gave me the time I needed to start recovering. I thought the first week was going to be miserable - similar to how the first week at home after having Emi was (lots of crying, little sleep, etc). Although her sleep schedule was a little off, it was not terrible. I do think she misses Scott, because she was more fussy than usual in the evenings, but it was manageable. I've been keeping busy with the mom's group, and my parents have been life savers and have been bringing me dinner a lot. I have a feeling that time will go by much faster once I start working (which I don't want to do), but it is still going to be a long 19 more weeks...

Emi had her 3 month check up and shots today. She weighed in at 12 pounds on the dot (and Grandpa measured her at 24 inches). My baby is growing up!

Just the two of us...

OK - I guess the accurate count is 4: Colette, Emi, Bear and Chewie.
Scott left on Saturday morning for the academy. The worst part of his leaving was the last 2 days, we were both sick. So rather than enjoy the time together before he left, we were both drugged up on cold medicine and trying not to touch the baby and get her sick. Fortunately, she seemed to escape catching whatever it is we have (knock on wood). I am wondering if Scott got it first - because he mentioned a scratchy throat a few days before I got mine, and he seemed to peak right around Sat/Sun. Tonight, I have started with the runny nose and have a little cough, which is where he was on Thursday. So we'll see what kind of shape I am in tomorrow morning.

The next worst thing about Scott's leaving is that Emi was sleeping when we got to the airport, and Scott didn't want to take her out of her car seat and wake her up. So he didn't get to give her a big hug and kiss goodbye. But the thought of Scott coming home for Thanksgiving, even if it's just for 2 nights, is comforting and I hope that it works out. I can only imagine how much Scott is missing Emi.

We had a good first 2 nights alone. In the evenings, every time she woke up, she woke up crying (maybe it's because she misses her daddy, and his giving her the last bottle of the night). But I was able to calm her down, and she slept pretty well both nights. This morning came earlier than usual (4:30am), but she went right back to sleep after a feeding.

Emi got her first boo boo today, and fortunately there is no mark or band aid to show for it (just the memory of her crying). There is a shelf above the changing table, which I thought may not be a good idea the first day we hung it - but managed to avoid bumping into it until now. Grandma and I were trying her Halloween costume on this afternoon, and Grandma picked her straight up without thinking of the shelf and she bumped her head on the edge of it (hard, the shelf bounced a little). For one second, it was quiet, then suddenly there was a scream (from Emi, and possibly from me) and then crying. It was the saddest thing to see her like that, even sadder than when she got her first shots. It was just unexpected, and followed by worry of red marks, bumps and lumps, soft spots on her head, and brain damage. But she calmed down, and then started acting like herself, and even smiling. So it all turned out ok, but the guilt and worry was the most emotion I think I've ever felt (not to mention Grandma who felt horrible and cried herself a little). Scott, if this shelf is no longer there when you come home for Thanksgiving, now you know why...

For the rest of the night, I have felt very protective of Emi, and even feel like I love her a little more now. There is no doubt that I loved her before today, but it's just a little more intense now. There was always a sense of having to care for her, but now it's a sense of having to protect her of things (even though I know there will be lots of scrapes and cuts in our future), and never wanting to see her cry or be hurt in any way. When I put her to bed tonight, looking at her peaceful sleeping face made my heart melt, and made me want to just hold her and kiss her and protect her from all things scary or hurtful. Wow, I never thought I would say this, but I feel like a mom.

2 months - 10.5 lbs, 23 inches

Emi,
I am so amazed at how fast you have grown, and that you are developing into your own little person already. We have finally gotten over the nursing hardships, and I can tell you are definitely getting enough to eat by the way you have grown. People always say that babies don't stay small long, and it's so true. I look at your early pictures, and hardly recognize that little monkey. You are starting to outgrow your newborn clothes (which is so sad), and we'll have to start putting you into your 3 months clothes soon.

The 2 comments that we get all the time - literally, from every stranger who takes a look at you:
OMG, look at all that hair!
She is so alert, looking at me and everything around her.

You love going outside. Sometimes when you are fussy (and believe me, you still have your moments!), we just take you outside and you calm right down. You also love being in your car seat, and going for car rides. I'm also grateful for the swing that we got for you - since you love it and sometimes that's the only place you will take a nap. We have gotten the hang of the moby wrap, and we need to get you out for more walks (more for mommy exercise time, rather than for you).

You got your first shots last week, and although you cried, you recovered pretty quickly (maybe it was that bottle that we shoved into your mouth after you stopped screaming). You're still figuring out if you are going to be a big kid (90th percentile for weight) or a small kid (50th percentile for height). We need to work on getting you turn your head to the left more often, and you need to sleep on your side and get more tummy time so you don't have a flat head (maybe that's why your hair sticks straight up like a rooster where it's flat?). We also need to work on your sleep and nap routine. It's all over the place right now - but I think you'll start sleeping in your crib soon and hopefully develop somewhat of a schedule.

My heart melts every morning when I wake up and take my first look at you. We'll have a lot of daddy time in the next couple of weeks before he leaves, and I can't wait to see what the next months have in store for us.