Just the two of us...

OK - I guess the accurate count is 4: Colette, Emi, Bear and Chewie.
Scott left on Saturday morning for the academy. The worst part of his leaving was the last 2 days, we were both sick. So rather than enjoy the time together before he left, we were both drugged up on cold medicine and trying not to touch the baby and get her sick. Fortunately, she seemed to escape catching whatever it is we have (knock on wood). I am wondering if Scott got it first - because he mentioned a scratchy throat a few days before I got mine, and he seemed to peak right around Sat/Sun. Tonight, I have started with the runny nose and have a little cough, which is where he was on Thursday. So we'll see what kind of shape I am in tomorrow morning.

The next worst thing about Scott's leaving is that Emi was sleeping when we got to the airport, and Scott didn't want to take her out of her car seat and wake her up. So he didn't get to give her a big hug and kiss goodbye. But the thought of Scott coming home for Thanksgiving, even if it's just for 2 nights, is comforting and I hope that it works out. I can only imagine how much Scott is missing Emi.

We had a good first 2 nights alone. In the evenings, every time she woke up, she woke up crying (maybe it's because she misses her daddy, and his giving her the last bottle of the night). But I was able to calm her down, and she slept pretty well both nights. This morning came earlier than usual (4:30am), but she went right back to sleep after a feeding.

Emi got her first boo boo today, and fortunately there is no mark or band aid to show for it (just the memory of her crying). There is a shelf above the changing table, which I thought may not be a good idea the first day we hung it - but managed to avoid bumping into it until now. Grandma and I were trying her Halloween costume on this afternoon, and Grandma picked her straight up without thinking of the shelf and she bumped her head on the edge of it (hard, the shelf bounced a little). For one second, it was quiet, then suddenly there was a scream (from Emi, and possibly from me) and then crying. It was the saddest thing to see her like that, even sadder than when she got her first shots. It was just unexpected, and followed by worry of red marks, bumps and lumps, soft spots on her head, and brain damage. But she calmed down, and then started acting like herself, and even smiling. So it all turned out ok, but the guilt and worry was the most emotion I think I've ever felt (not to mention Grandma who felt horrible and cried herself a little). Scott, if this shelf is no longer there when you come home for Thanksgiving, now you know why...

For the rest of the night, I have felt very protective of Emi, and even feel like I love her a little more now. There is no doubt that I loved her before today, but it's just a little more intense now. There was always a sense of having to care for her, but now it's a sense of having to protect her of things (even though I know there will be lots of scrapes and cuts in our future), and never wanting to see her cry or be hurt in any way. When I put her to bed tonight, looking at her peaceful sleeping face made my heart melt, and made me want to just hold her and kiss her and protect her from all things scary or hurtful. Wow, I never thought I would say this, but I feel like a mom.