Goodnight

I'm not sure why I am feeling so sentimental tonight. It might be because it's so quiet in the house tonight, or that things have settled down a little earlier in the evening than normal, or because I just finished watching a relatively intense episode of "The Closer". But I can't help but think that life is short, and that it if you are not careful it can pass you by faster than you could ever anticipate.

As I turned the TV off, prepared bottles for daycare tomorrow, turned off the lights and headed upstairs, I had to fight the urge to pick Emi up and just cuddle with her for the rest of the night. If I am lucky, I will have a very long time to hug her, to show her I love her, to get to know her and hopefully become friends with her. I think about my parents and how lucky I am to have them as such a big part of my life. They are some of my favorite people in this world, and I am fortunate that our relationship has blossomed into what it is today. I hope that I am as lucky as they are. I hope I get at least 35 years to know my daughter, to see what she becomes, and stand by her every milestone in life.

35 years sounds like a very long time, and hopefully it will turn out to be much longer than that. But right now, I just feel like Emi's first year has flown by. If the remainder of the years pass at this pace, it might make 35 years feel more like 35 seconds. I can only hope that one day I will be old and gray, and Scott is by my side and we can look at the daughter that we created and know that the world is right. But right now, I just feel like I want to hug Emi and not let this moment, this age, this day, this overwhelming love I feel for her go.